Sara E. Hirt and Mika Czirr

This paper will discuss many aspects of attraction that the average person may not be aware of. Attraction is best known through the initial interpretation of physical features (genetics) that draws one person to another. The topics that will be discussed in this paper are physical attractiveness, sexual scents, non-verbal behaviors, and cultural differences. We will also take a look at the reasons for the conscious and unconscious actions we take in using these behaviors to draw attention to our selves will also be discussed.

What makes people attracted to other people? Many people assume that it's good looks, a great looking body, and a sparkling personality. But what exactly do these qualities mean? Research has shown that attraction may not be so simple. They think that many of the things that attract us are unconscious, instinctual choices that ensure healthy offspring.

The meaning behind ideal attractions

As you first look at and think of the word attraction what really crosses your mind? Physical and body features are probably the first conscious thought of attraction that crosses your mind. All of us can look back to some part of our lives and remember what we once or still may have pictured what our ideal mates features and personality traits might be. Some of the features you might be thinking about are youthfulness, eye color, hair, acne-free skin, build or shape and height.

A survey found by Andy DePew rated the physical features that men and women noticed first. The finding was that men over weighed the percentages in the appearance areas(legs, face, figure) more than women. The number one observation and judgment for men is attraction of facial features, body, you name it. Though in the women's category they tipped the scales in the presentation of the male (how dressed, hygiene). Attraction, though, is more than the obvious initial first look. Women want more than the all ideal pretty boy, they are looking for resources, personal relationship growth, intelligence and a sense of humor (Psychology Today). For years the women and men of our race have been shaping, building, toning, and forming their bodies to an ideal image that our culture holds as attractive.

In the past years we have heard of Japanese women deforming their feet in bandages for the desire or sexual attraction gained from their husbands and future prospects. Today in Japan they hold a desire of attraction through women having small faces and features (world press, 1997). Regardless of the culture we still find one common factor in attraction, physical features of the human body. The requirements of Asians, Blacks, Whites, and Hispanic facial features have been found (Men's Health Journal 95) as having high eyebrows, large spaced eyes, high cheekbones, large smile, full lower lip, small nose and a narrow face in correlation of finding a mate.

In the American culture, we try to enhance our appearance to gain ultimate attraction. We go through rituals of having hair cuts, tints, and dyes to makeup, acne medicine even to surgical procedures to lift skin and wrinkles. For men they do the same just a little less. Men enhance their appearance by having hair cuts, play sports for fitness, and work out. A majority of our culture can't role out of bed beautiful. We work hard at achieving the appearance we want to portray. The underlining cause and meaning for all of the rituals we put ourselves through is so we can compete and enhance the chances of finding a mate.

The ritual is to make one's appearance as best as it can be. We also use fake fingernails, hair dyes, clothes, and high heel shoes, to exaggerate the illusion of being taller, having longer hands, healthier cheeks, smaller waists, etc.

Found in the Evolution of Desire (David Buss p.111) that using our false attractions as makeup, nails and other false attractions are an allure of a sexual partner before a marital one. The reasoning is men find women who fit themselves when finding their ideal mate.

Height in men and women is important in the first initial attraction. When a woman dances with another man she expects to be able to rest her head on his shoulder, look up and gaze into his eyes while he holds her in his strong arms that are wrapped around her shoulders. That is the ideal picture many of us hold when dancing or kissing our loved ones. This image is distorted if we add a much shorter man with the taller woman on the dance floor or the tall man with a very short woman. Findings show that women do like to have men up to six inches taller than their initial height (Ladies Home Journal). Also found in the article was a correlation between taller heights of men with job promotions, better jobs, and better income pay. Attractiveness seems to be the key to success.

Another shocking element of attraction found in the Men's health journal was that the images seen on television is of all the extremely slender flat bodies of "skin and bones" are not what is attractive in a real personal relationship. Men are looking for women who have average weight for their height not the extremely slender(thin) image that is portrayed on television. When a man comes on to a woman, mainly for the attraction of her body, he does not realize consciously the reason for the attraction rather than just what is obvious. He is looking for strong genetic traits, a healthy immune system, and fertility.

We all have seen or heard of older men who marry or date younger women. Have you ever thought why? Findings show that men prefer women to be younger; on the average of 1-2 years younger in the twenties, five years younger in the thirties, and twenty years younger than men in their 50's. Youthfullness shows age, health, vigor, fun and reproductive value (Men's Health Journal).

Hourglass figure: The bodily attraction

The Hourglass figure (hip-to-waist ratio) is another attribute of attraction to the woman's body. What we are looking at here when we say Hourglass figure is the woman's curvy body shape. We are seeking out the shape of the woman's body by taking a measurement of the circumference of the waist and dividing the waist by the measurement of the hips. The ideal measurement is to either have a constant .70 or below to have the curvy shape. The size of the body weight on a person does not have an effect of the hourglass shape as long as the ratio averages out to be .70 or below (Ladies Home Journal 95). As stated earlier in the paper men prefer a fuller woman of weight around his own.

To men the hourglass shape of a woman is thought of as sexy. For years the media, health professionals have set standards on women. The standard is the thin --person with the flat stomach. People have advertised the thin ideal as sexy and desirable. The image had a stigma attached to it, saying your only good enough if your thin. The research for this paper shows the opposite stated above. Men are finding women who fit with themselves, and whose weight is normal.

Also found in the article was a concept that the more curvaceous the woman the better capability she has to carry her offspring, and the more fertile she might be. Some of the major traits that the hip-to-waist ratio carries is the ability it has to reflect on her health and immune system, and value on her sexual reproduction system. There has been evidence found in the variations of size on the hip-to-waist ratio was shown to have a link to the time of term a woman carries her unborn child. Science News states that women with a higher ratio tend to keep a unborn child to term longer than a narrow closed hip person whom has a lower hip-to-waist ratio. Also a lower ratio person can get pregnant more easily than a person with a high ratio (.70 or higher).

The hip-to-waist ratio is also involved with the idea of attraction through the slender shape and build of a woman that catches a man's eye. The brain in the man's head might be saying WOW! Though unconsciously his body, senses and unconscious thoughts are looking for youth, genes, health, vigor, and fertility. That is why we say there is more to what our eyes know and the brain doesn't tell. From past decades to early human life we may have used more than our perceptions and ideals. Though now we have all forgotten the knowledge knowingly we still go after better ideal people who we connect through by looks, body, and traits.

Symmetry in the Human Body

Symmetry in basic understanding is the level of body and facial features that are in the closest level of measurement and alignment on opposite sides of the body from each other. There is no real true symmetry on the human body. The body is separated only in the smallest detail of five millimeters if that. True symmetry can be found manufactured in items such as dolls. Scientists' findings show new data on symmetry and physical attraction with the correlation's outcomes on genetic health, and the reproductive systems. People today find symmetry appealing because it shows strong genetic genes, good immune health, and attitude.

Recently in the past three years symmetrical studies on the body shape and on both sides of the body has taken a flight in a new direction. The research study headed by Thornhill, studying the swallows chances for sexual reproduction if the birds feathers were asymmetrical(unbalanced). The results in the study were that the swallow's chances were declined by the deformity of being selected as mate and mating. Now research is being done on the human population and the results that symmetry holds for our race and the reproduction means. This form of research is new and is not credited yet, though there are a few studies being done at a few Universities as New Mexico and Manchester. The findings that Thornhill has made are startling in the preferences in choosing a mate.

An article found in the study of Human Symmetry and Sex by David Concar (1996) has researched that asymmetry in the human shapes, sizes and forms sends a message of physical flaws in the genetic features and genes. This is interpreted to another individual as unattractive in the way of beauty and biological genetics. As stated before, we notice signals of messages that attract us even if we are unaware that we are picking up these signals.

One assumption I would like to sum up is that there is no one with a perfectly symmetrical body except for statues. The difference in the body with a person who has symmetrical features and asymmetrical features are the percentages in the body. The symmetrical individual will have a 5% difference compared to the asymmetrical person with the 10-20% asymmetrical size, shape, and form. Realizing that the differences in body are found by the body if only by the smallest millimeters in the human body. Beauty in the article by Concar shows that people prefer another person with a symmetrical body.

Symmetry of the body also shows good genetics, diet, strong immune system, and reproductive abilities. Other research is being done in the correlation of heritable fitness. The people with the best genes and who get the best food supplies will succeed in the development of the best bodies. One correlation developed by Thornhill and Gangestad on a student college population of 122 students and their sexual histories. The results showed that on the average, the students with the almost perfect bodily symmetries in regard to hands, wrists, feet, ankles, ears, and elbows were reported as in having as many lifetime sexual partners to date than the students with the asymmetrical bodies.

Another finding in the symmetry of a woman's body was that women with symmetrical breasts are found to be more fertile as the women with asymmetrical breasts are less. There are a number of correlations on symmetry and the human body. The key to the symmetrical body is that beauty matter's most. The evidence in the research shows that men pick women with symmetrical bodies and faces in pictures. A person who has a symmetrical body also has symmetrical features such as eyes, jaw line, and smile. Since the human race's existence today does not rely solely on the role of reproduction or the selection of a mate unlike the swallow listed above.

Years ago in the caveman age this might have mattered more. The intrigue of this thing is we still choose to follow the patterns of selection even today. Culture may be a way of helping us choose a mate but not the action behind it.

Sexual Scents

Pheromones

For many years researchers have known that pheromones playa big part in how animals choose mates, but now many researchers feel that humans are effected by these chemicals as well. Pheromones are chemical secreted that send information about our sexual state and health, and elicit responses from other members of the same species. These excretions come from specialized apocrine gland (Midlife Woman, 1997). There are two types of pheromones:

1. signaling

2. primer

The primer pheromones bring about physiological changes in an individual (ex. puberty, ovulation). The signaling pheromones are used in sexual attraction, and may be controlled by our emotions (Midlife Woman, 1997). Pheromones come from specialized apocrine glands and work with the hair follicles and sweat glands. Sweat is thought to help activate and disperse the pheromones (Midlife Woman, 1997). These chemicals often do not emit any smell, but we unconsciously sense the messages that are being sent (Furlow1996).

We sense these chemicals through special tiny pits on the inside of our nose on the septal wall called vomeronasal organs (VNO) (Cowley and Springen, 1997). These pits are so small that until 1930's they were believed to be nonexistent in humans (Furlow, 1996). Receptor cells send messages to our "primitive brain" or limbic system of the brain (Midlife Woman, 1997).

Although it is clear that humans have pheromones and that they do cause some physiological changes, it is unclear how much of an effect they have. Experiments at the University of Utah found that pheromones cause changes in skin conductance and may also cause brain wave synchronization (Midlife Woman, 1997). It has also been found that male pheromones influence the female menstrual cycle. Women who are separated from male contact tend to enter puberty later than those who are exposed to males, and menstrual regulation improves with regular male association (Midlife Woman, 1997). Another study gauged the effect of the smell of androstenal, a human steroid. The study began by placing a group of women in a room that had been sprayed with the steroid and asking them to rate several pictures of men. A second group of women were placed in a sterile room and were asked to rate the same pictures. It was found that the pictures in the sprayed room were rated much more sexually attractive than the pictures in the unsprayed room (Midlife Woman, 1997). In a third study smells, or essences from the underarms of men and frozen for one year. These were then thawed and placed under the nose of women. Two main effects were found.

1. Women who were irregular tended to regulate when exposed to the essence.
2. Increased sexual activity among women who received the essence.

1-3 weeks of exposure
36% weekly sex - essence
11% weekly sex - placebo

4-14 weeks of exposure
73% weekly sex - essence
11% weekly sex - placebo

--(Mid-life Woman, 1997)

Research for the effect of odor on attractiveness came from an unexpected source when discoveries were made by geneticists who were studying the immune system in mice. Part of our DNA, called the major histocompatibility complex (MHC), determines what diseases we are inherently resistant to. These genes have many alternative codes and are codependent instead of dominant-recessive. For example, if a mouse receives the code that resists for disease a from it's mother and receives the code that resists for disease B from it's father, it will be resistant to both.(Furlow, 1996)

The immune system creates scented proteins that are unique to every version of the gene, and researchers found that female mice would, after smelling the urine of the male mice, would choose a mate whose MHC lest overlapped her own, therefore giving the offspring a wider base of resistance. (Furlow, 1996)

A team of researchers from the University of Bern in Switzerland researched the effect of MHC on humans. They started with one hundred college students. The males were chosen from one school and females from another to reduce the chance of prior contact. The men wore untreated cotton shirts to bed for two nights. They were restricted from spicy foods, deodorants, cologne, smoking, drinking, and sex during the study. The shirts ere kept in sealed containers during the day. (Furlow,1996)

The women were given the men's shirts and a clean shirt for a control and were asked to sniff them and rate them for sexiness, pleasantness, and intensity. It was found that the ratings varied depending on how much the men's' MHC varied form their own. The more varied the higher the ratings tended to be. As a result what attracted one woman would repel another. The Swiss researchers also found that woman taking oral birth control, which tricks the body into thinking it is pregnant, had the opposite effect when sniffing the shirts. (Furlow,1996)

It has also been known by doctors since the 1980's that couples who share a similar MHC tend to have many more miscarriages than those couples whose MHC's vary greatly. It is hypothesized that this is the body's way of preventing the birth of children whose immune system are inferior and were not, in the distant past, likely to survive childhood. (Furlow,1996)

Have you ever sat across the room wondering if you dare to hit on that gorgeous person sitting at the bar? If you are good at reading non-verbal behavior you should have no problems answering that question. There are many different conscious and unconscious behaviors that people emit when they are open to interpersonal encounters and more importantly, if that encounter will involve you.

According to Jan Hargrave (1995) there are definable turn taking steps in flirting and each person must move at the right pace. If a man moves ahead with out letting the woman her turn he is perceived as too fast, but if he moves too slow he is perceived as not interested. Hargrave also found that the first move is almost exclusively the woman's although usually is unconsciously made. These attention getting behaviors fall into three categories:

(1) Movements of face & head
(2) Gestures
(3) Posture Changes.

Our heads are an important part of our non-verbal behavior. We use them to indicate our interest and desire for further communication by nodding or tilting our head. Tilting the head back reveals the neck and throat. This is a throwback to our primitive days, when it was used as a submissive gesture and was (and still is) mostly used by women. A woman who is listening closely to someone she is attracted to will tilt her head side ways while giving furtive sidelong glances. (Lloydd-Elliott, 1994)

Non-verbal signals that involve the hair can also be indicative of attraction. Women will often toss their hair back or play peekaboo with it (a game that we will describe later in this paper). Preening gestures are definite signs of sexual interest. These can include stroking the hair, rearranging, or holding the hair on top of the head while exposing the neck. (Lloydd-Elliott, 1994)

The eyes are said to be the window to the soul and are undoubtedly one of the biggest non-verbal communicators that we have. One of the first and uncontrolled signals of sexual interest is dilation of the pupils. Women have known this fact for centuries. Eighteenth century Italian women used a belladonna extract to make the pupils larger and to appear sexier. The low light of candlelight also makes the pupils larger, hence the romanticism of candlelight dinners, and women all the way from ancient Egypt used makeup to enhance the appeal of the eye. (Lloydd-Elliott, 1994) Eyebrows frame the eyes and therefore are also an important part in flirting behavior. Men often use an "eyebrow flash" to show interest once eye contact has been made. The first thing you may think of when you read sexual behavior of the eyes is a wink, but blinking can be even more indicative of attraction because it is unconscious. According to Lloyd-Elliott (1994) it is possible to make a person feel attracted to you by blinking faster. The other person will also start blinking faster and will unconsciously try to match your rate. This is why fluttering you eyelashes is considered flirtatious. Another sexual signal using the eyes is the well known peekaboo game. Most people think that this is just a child's game, but adults play this game all the time. This is done by deliberately interrupting your eye contact and then re-engaging. This is often done around a newspaper, menu or wineglass. When playing this game the secret is to look like you are gazing instead of staring. To do this you must look down before looking away when breaking off the gaze.(Lloydd-Elliott, 1994)

The mouth is another body part that is used to indicate sexual attraction. The lips are one of the most sensual parts of the body and licking them, touching them, and biting the lower lip is very erotic to the opposite sex, especially men. Smiles are a powerful signal in the attraction game. They attract attention and signal interest. Color also plays a part in the sexual importance of lips. Arousal leads to increased blood supply to the lips, making them redder and signaling sexual interest to the opposite sex. Women have artificially colored their lips for over 5000 years showing all along that they have known the attraction of the lips. (Lloydd-Elliott, 1994)

Hands play three main roles in non-verbal communication: Touching, pointing, and signaling. Men will often unconsciously attract attention to their genitals with their hands. This is done by a simple gesture as sticking their hands in their pockets, or taking a cowboy stance. We often bring attention to different parts of our bodies by touching them, for example, rubbing the neck, touching the lips, or stroking a beard or mustache. Another unconscious gesture that signals sexual attraction is the fondling of objects such as the stem of a wine glass or a pen and if two people are really in tune with there attraction for each other they start a behavior called mirroring. Mirroring is the unconscious copying of each other's behaviors. This behavior not includes not only gestures, but body postures, and facial expressions also. There are two different ways of mirroring: half-mirroring, which is copying right and right or left and left as in eating where both people lift their forks with their right hands. Then there is full mirroring where the two people copy each other facing each other on the same (right to left) side. (Lloydd-Elliott, 1994)

Postures tell others a lot about our moods and our intentions. Men will often stand in a way that shows off their size or proclaim dominance when they are in the presence of someone that they are sexually interested in. A few examples are: standing with hands on hips or with thumbs hooked in pockets. Men also often sit with their legs spread; taking up more space. Women will cross and uncross their legs.

Nonverbal Signals that show that a woman is interested (Rabin, 1997)

Nonverbal Signals that show that a man is interested (Rabin, 1997)

It is just an important , in order to avoid embarrassment, to know the non-verbal behaviors that signal "I'm NOT interested". These signals are sometimes called "de-courting". The most obvious of these signals would e withdrawal of attentiveness. When in doubt, it is best to stick to the "Rules of Four". Make sure that you see at least four separate signals that you perceive has sexual intent. Most important of all is to make sure that those signals are directed at you!(Lloyd-Elliott, 1994)

For the most part the sexual nonverbal behavior is a crossed culture, but it is important to be aware of some of the differences to avoid confusing or embarrassing signals. One of the main cultural differences evident in sexual behavior is in personal space zones. Many misunderstandings can occur because people make assumptions about what is comfortable space zone and sexual intent may be read when none is intended.

Eye contact is another area that differs between cultures. Eye contact in North America, Britain, European and Jewish cultures signifies assertiveness, honesty, and self confidence, but in West Indian and oriental cultures eye contact is considered a sexual advance and should be avoided between unmarried couples. It could be socially disastrous if the wrong message was sent.

The secrets to attraction that we have found are not secrets their just merely behaviors and reactions that are triggered through our senses(Pheromones) and our perceptions. The secrets, as you might call them, listed in the paper above we all share them in common. All of us attract attention in our own way; weather we are consciously or unconsciously attempting to be noticed. Cultures affect the attempt for attraction in the perfection of beauty and the behavior styles used to attract others. In regards to the information found in the paper above, the findings on the Sexual Scents and Symmetry alone are awaking in the fact that we unconsciously use this information on the genetic basis of finding the mate with the "best offer". To me the secrets of attraction are found to be interrelated to one another and that we may even use the behaviors and senses in stages in later research. What ever we are using or portraying our selves to be attraction is the ultimate goal in finding a mate.

Bald, M. (1997). Small Faces, Big Sales. World Press. 44(11) 36.

Buss, D. M. (1994). The Evolution of desire: strategies of human mating. Harper Collins Publishing Inc.: NY.

Concar, D.(1995). Sex and the Symmetrical Body. New Scientist. 40-44.

Cowley, G. & Springen, K. (1997). Is there a sixth sense? Newsweek. Vol 130(15). 67.

Furlow, F. B. (1996). The smell of love. Omni. Vol. 29(2). 38-48.

Hargrove, J. (1995). Let me see your body talk. Kendoll / Hunt Publishing Co.: Dubuque, IA.

LLoyd-Elliott, Martin. (1994). The secrets of attraction. Hamlyn: London

Rabin, Susan (1997). 101 way to flirt. Penguin Books Ltd.: Harmondsworth, England.

The Facts of Love. Ladies Home Journal. March 95: 2.

Hidden Persuaders? (1997). Midlife Woman. Vol 6(1) 1-3.

The Shape of Evolution. Science News. 21 September 93: 8.

Why Tarzan Met Jane, Men's Health, September 95: 10.

http://www.webwhiz.net/phero/pheromone.htm
This web page tells about and sells lab made pheromones

http://www.teenadvice.org/dating/flirting.html
This page gives advice on the art of flirting.

http://www.home1.gte.net/donsteel/bodylang.htm
This site is called Body language secrets and it discusses body language of sexual attraction. It also advertises a book by the same name.

http://www.cyberingirls.com/mg/Page2.htm
This site tells about a new book about flirting and courting, called the meeting game.

http://topchoice.com/~psyche/love/misc/signals9706.html
This site gives advice on reading female nonverbal signals

http://oak.cats.ohiou.edu/`gk143494/flirt.htm
This site briefly discusses the importance of the awareness of the non-verbal behaviors in flirting.

http://www.thejack.nau.edu/021496/life1.htm1
This site discusses views of what women really want in men.

http://psych-server.iastate.edu/faculty/dedwards/web/314www/314cls17.htm
This site gives simple facts on Attraction, Love, and Commitment

Mika M. Czirr is a undergraduate at Emporia State University. She is majoring in Psychology and minoring in Special Education. Her interests are helping children and adults in the community.

Sara E. Hirt is an undergraduate at Emporia State University. She is majoring in Psychology and minoring in rehabilitation. Her interests are in working with children in a rehabilitation setting.